so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
