Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
