when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
