At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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