I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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