She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
