Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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