she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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