Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
pray to the hookup gods
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
