Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry meggietoast hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you

Fav 23 1179 2343
share tweet
(609): View more from New Jersey

No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.

Fav 10 3067 1039
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(804): View more from Virginia

god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.

Fav 8 3344 1098
share tweet
(360): View more from Washington

While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.

Fav 16 6838 1099
share tweet
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.

Fav 17 8659 1214
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman

Fav 22 4580 2600
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(815): View more from Illinois

drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.

Fav 4 4184 1250
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out

Fav 0 598 457
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(405): View more from Oklahoma

I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom

Fav 0 44 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT