I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
