she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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