its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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