thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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