What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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