There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
