butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
