:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
