on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
