worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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