dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
