UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize