Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
