Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
