so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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