I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize