I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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