i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
