She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize