I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
