i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
