also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Randomize
