Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
