Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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