he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
