Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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