They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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