Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
