i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize