the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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