I am in a vortex of obligation.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize