puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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