ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
