I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
