No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
