S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
