Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
