he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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