did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Can Purell be used as lube?
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
