Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
